mindset

How can I start today?

When you want to change your habits, it can be overwhelming.

Those of us who have tried multiple diets, exercise programs, small vs large changes in our lifestyle… we get it.

We’ve been there. We know what you’re thinking and what you’re going through.


There will never be a “perfect” time to start.

Perfection is an illusion, and it’s also a method of procrastination that SOUNDS noble. But, basically, it’s an excuse.

Meet yourself where you are today
.

Start today finding things you LIKE about your body and your life. Find things you’re doing well already. Write them down!!

Then keep doing them consistently… then add other small things, that may seem silly or inconsequential or “not enough” at first… write them down, commit to them, practice them… then slowly keep adding.

Before you know it, the time has passed, you pick your head up… and you’ve achieved your goals.

Let me help you, it would be my honor. I can teach you how to become the best version of yourself. Click here to start thriving today.

Let’s stay in touch.

Commitment

Commitment is “the state or quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity, etc” according to the dictionary.

We all have our own interpretation of what commitment means, what it looks like, what actions we take that prove we are committed to something.

Commitment to me is taking action to move forward toward a goal or outcome.

I remember being afraid or doubtful about my capacity to achieve something.

One example for me is that I remember debating whether I could walk into a new gym, sign up, and complete a workout when I was out of shape and awkward.

You may scoff at this example, but, being an introvert, the fear of new places and people held me back for years.

It’s taken coaching, practice, and courage to become who I am today.

I made a commitment to being healthy that helped me overcome my excuses to stay where I was because it was familiar and comfortable.

 A lot of people talk about wanting something or wanting to achieve a goal or outcome. They debate whether one path or another would be good, they even express their dreams verbally, but then they remain stuck in place. They can picture where they want to be, but, for reasons only known to them, they don’t ever act to achieve this desired outcome.

I hate to break it to you, friends, but talk is cheap. You can talk about something all day long, but, in the end, if you’re not taking action toward your goal, I call bs. You don’t really want it.

That’s where commitment comes in.

When you are truly committed to a goal and bringing it to life – you can plan, you can talk about it, you can visualize it all you want, but, at some point, you need to act.

This is the single most important step. What makes you take action or stay complacent? Your thoughts and feelings about achieving your desired result.

It’s as simple as that. Y

ou hold yourself back. I’ve done it, many times.

I can tell you exactly why too.

I was scared. I felt safe and comfortable where I was. I wasn’t ready. The scales hadn’t tipped enough to make me want to tip that balance in action toward my goal. Sound familiar?

There is never going to be a best time to change your thoughts, feelings, or actions. There will always be some excuse that will allow you to stay where you are. It may sound legitimate. It may sound comforting; this excuse may seem like a fact. I’m here to tell you that it’s not. An excuse is just that, an excuse. Either you are taking action when you want something or your brain is giving you reasons not to.

Commitment is recognizing that your brain will give you resistance. It will supply a multitude of reasons why you don’t act, even when you think you really are serious about wanting something.

I know from experience that if you want something, you take action to get it regardless of your fear, your doubt, your excuses.

The people who are truly committed to achieving their outcome are taking action.

They may fail (we will cover failure and what it actually is…spoiler alert – it’s a learning opportunity) repeatedly but they don’t give up until they achieve their goal. They learn as they go but they keep moving forward.

Decide what you’re committed to today and work for it.

I challenge you to feel the fear and do it anyway.

Fear + action = courage.

Courage + action = commitment.

Let’s stay in touch.

The Future You

Let’s talk today about acting as if you’ve already changed.

I do my best thinking while hiking

Picture your future self.

Does he/she remind you of someone you already know and may admire?

Your future self is successful in whenever habit or lifestyle change you’re trying to make currently.

Maybe it’s eating less junk food, moving more purposefully, drinking less soda or hitting the gym a certain number of times a week….

When you picture yourself already at your goal, what thoughts are you thinking?

Is it hard to move through your day to day choices and activities or is it easy?

Which changes would need to be made to move from you now to you then?

What thoughts are you thinking now that are not serving you?

What actions and thoughts can you focus on to help you shift you thinking to help make the action of acting “as if” you have achieved her goal a little bit easier each day?

Asking yourself these questions can help you formulate the plan to move yourself forward through your discomfort while you execute changes in your life.

This life hack of accessing your future success thoughts and feelings can assist you in stepping into who you want to become.

If this sounds like something that interests you, let me know – I’d love to help you get there faster so you can start being that person sooner than you think you can right now.

Have a lovely day my friends!

Inspiration

What inspires you?

I’m inspired by growing and learning.

I’m inspired by people around me, by books I read, by motivational posts. Heck, occasionally I even inspire myself (remember that time when…).

Learning more about why I do what I do and why I feel the way I do has helped me transform my life.

For most of it, I was seeking knowledge from books and self-help and personal exploration.

I’m pretty stubborn so it was always easier for me to read something and think of another person in my life who could benefit.

I don’t know if you’ve experienced this, but when you try to tell people what they should do or feel… it doesn’t usually turn out so well… for you. Lol.

Once I learned to stay in my own lane and focus on myself and how I could improve myself and my life, things started to shift. It was pretty slow at first.

I first read Loving what Is by Byron Katie about 12 years ago. I was going through some big transitions personally and it helped to start letting go of fighting with reality (because you lose, every time). I continued to apply this to my life.

I then came across The Four Agreements a few years later. Awesome content and ideas – life lessons, really. There’s a lot of fantastic self-care in there: “Be impeccable with your word, don’t take anything personally, don’t make assumptions, always do your best”.

What more do you need? Well, first off, it’s great to consume, but if you don’t translate that into action… it doesn’t really change much.

About 18 months ago, I happened upon a podcast by Brooke Castillo. I had found it based on listening to one of her former students’ podcasts about weight loss and I loved her approach.

Six months later, I signed up for her self-coaching program to get more insight into how I tick and to see if I could change and to get some coaching myself.

13 months later (as of January 2020), here we are. I feel like my world and my opportunities have exploded. And all of it started with my thoughts and being open to coaching and learning more about myself.

This is all why I am here now and why Thrive Arena exists – so I can help other people grow and transform. It’s so exciting and I feel like my world has opened up immensely. I want to share my excitement and joy with you all! I want everyone to feel as fantastic as I do on a day to day basis. I feel confident, I feel complete, I feel overjoyed, and I feel empowered and it’s freaking amazing!

If we all learn, apply, then teach… this world could be so much more amazing. I can see what is possible, a world filled with love, kindness, and growth for everyone who wants it.

I also truly believe in Brooke’s message of wanting everyone to have the best mental and emotional health possible to grow and thrive.

So here I am, feeling inspired, sharing my inspirational sources with you and hopefully inspiring you to continue to grow in your life and then inspire someone else to grow as well.

Have a fantastic day!

Worthiness

Do you get up every morning and believe that you are worthy?

Most of us don’t take the time to consciously ponder this question, but if you ask yourself now and reflect on your life – you’ll quickly know whether you believe that you’re worthy of your current life.

As humans, our lives are shaped by our experiences from the time we are born. At the time we are born, we exist and we are worthy.

If we consider that we’re all worthy just for existing, does that change how you feel about your place in this world?

Do you think and treat yourself as if you’re worthy of existing? Taking up space? Inhabiting your body?

Our thoughts and beliefs determine our lives. Our self-esteem and self-worth is determined by our beliefs and our experiences.

A lot of the time, we let other people determine our worthiness, either intentionally or unintentionally. When someone else communicates with us what they think about us, we can internalize their thoughts and take them on as our own (usually unintentionally unless it’s a belief that we already have or one that serves us).

If we routinely do this, we are giving away our control and our self-esteem to others around us who don’t even know us on the same level that we know ourselves. Remember, our reality is created through the lens of our experiences. Sometimes we never stop to ask ourselves what we think about us and our lives and our worthiness. Unless we learn to value our own thoughts above all others, we can be overly concerned with outside influences and they can drive our lives.

What the heck does this have to do with weight loss, nutrition, body size and our mindset? Well, everything.

Think about this- if you don’t believe that you’re worthy, are you going to respect or love yourself?

Will you nourish your body and your mind or will you seek out ways to reinforce how other people judge you (for example, lazy, rude, ignorant, etc)?

Take a minute and think about what your life will look like if you make the choice right now to believe in yourself and your worth?

How will your life change?

Will you make better choices in your thoughts, your actions, your day to day food choices, what you spend your time on, what you dedicate your thoughts to? I believe that you will.

The first step, my friends, is to believe that you are worthy of everything you want to achieve. You can do this. I can help if you want assistance.

Have a wonderful day. Believe in your worth. I believe in you.

Anxiety

What is anxiety?

It can be defined as the body’s natural response to stress. It is a feeling of fear or apprehension of what’s to come. It is thought to be normal in situations such as public speaking or going into a new situation such as a job interview or the first day of school.

Anxiety begins with a thought about the future that may or may not come to fruition.

Anxiety can evolve into a series of thoughts that becomes a habit, a pattern, a habitual way of thinking. When it starts to interfere with daily activities and is provoked in situations where it does not routinely occur, it can be diagnosed as a disease process that is abnormal (that is not what we are typically referring to here).

Some people may be predisposed to anxiety thoughts – either as a protective mechanism from childhood, as a result of modeling parental behaviors or through learned habits that are routinely reinforced.

There’s a quote that worry is a debt for a thing we have not yet purchased. Why would we take on debt when we get nothing for it?

Because our mind experiences worry as as something useful, as an action, it gives us something to do.

Especially when there’s a situation or circumstance that we have no control over.

I understand that it feels useful to worry, to ponder, to think about all possible outcomes, as if this could somehow change the outcome or protect us. It feels that we’re doing something productive to find a solution.

Anxiety can also be a cover for other emotions that we’re not wanting to feel (like hurt, anger, sadness) and it can be a protective emotion.

This is not meant to be a discussion today about anxiety as a disorder or a diagnosis that has a biochemical or hormonal basis (that’s a whole other topic).

We’re talking about the feeling of anxiety that exists in our lives day-to-day. That nagging sensation that arises when we feel out of control and out of touch and unable to stop ourselves from worrying about something that we have no control over.

As I was writing the initial draft of this post, one of my mentors and an expert in the nutrition field, Georgie Fear, RD, published a fantastic article about nutrition and how it affect the feeling of anxiety. Read it here. She writes brilliantly about how what we eat affects our level and perception of anxiety. I encourage you to read it and incorporate her suggestions for decreasing day-to-day anxiety symptoms by adjusting your nutrition accordingly.

It should be no surprise that processed foods, sugar, and other fatty foods can increase our sensation of anxiety and depression.

Think about the circumstances that cause you to worry.

What types of things cause you anxiety?

Why do they cause you to worry?

Think back to situations where you had worried ahead of time. Then think about after that event or time… did the worry help? Did it feel justified? Did it feel useful?

Meditating with the Headspace app keeps me centered on a daily basis

Try this exercise. Choose to become aware of your worry, your anxiety and watch it when it occurs. Be curious about it. Don’t judge it (or yourself for having it), just observe it as it spreads through your awareness.

Next, describe how your body feels when you’re experiencing it in the moment. Does your stomach clench, do your muscles tighten, does your heart race? Do you start to sweat or feel jittery? Write down or verbalize what sensations you are feeling in your physical body. Watch your mind as you watch your feeling and are aware of it.

What thoughts are increasing this sensation? What thoughts are decreasing it? How could you choose to think about the circumstance that is causing your anxiety?

Let me know… how did you do? What did you feel? What did you notice?

Feeling Happy

 Do you believe that you’re doing life wrong if you’re not happy 100% of the time or at least the majority of the time?

Do you feel like everyone else at work, at home, on social media is always feeling great and you’re wondering what you’re doing wrong because your life is not optimal and spewing kittens and rainbows most of the time (or whatever symbols of happiness you equate with joy in your life)?

This is a common phenomenon.

What if you weren’t meant to be happy and filled with joy and optimism all the time?

What if you needed to feel the contrast of feelings and emotions in your life for there to be balance.

Would you fight so hard against sadness, hurt, anger and discomfort?

Would you allow the discomfort of difficult emotions?

What if we spent half our lives resisting the negative in our quest for the positive and we weren’t meant to?

What if we could learn to allow the uncomfortable or negative emotions and create balance in our lives.

Every feeling has its place and every feeling is temporary. No feeling lasts forever.

Does this shift anything in your mind? It did in mine.

I was pushing so hard to feel happy, to meet some impossible ideal of what I thought my life was supposed to be. This concept set me free. It gave me permission to feel everything. It still was scary at first.

It meant I wouldn’t feel great all the time. But the flip side was that when I felt negatively…that too would pass. If we’re consumed by our feelings, we think that it will never end. The good news is that it will.

It was amazing and upsetting at the same time. It also fed my cognitive desire to know why – it makes sense that without sadness, we don’t have a perspective of what happy is. The yin and the yang of life.

I realized that I want to be sad when I hear about tragedy or death. I don’t want to fight that. I want to feel it. It also helps to feel empowered and safe. Our feelings and emotions can feel big and overwhelming. They can feel unending.

If the worst we can feel is a feeling and we know that it is going to end… then what do we really have to fear or resist?

The more we resist and push against the negative emotions, the stronger the influence they have on our lives.

When we choose to allow them and see their utility and welcome the temporary nature of all feelings, we are more balanced as humans and we employ less force to push them all through.

How would your life change if you decided today to allow your uncomfortable or negative emotions and recognize them as temporary feelings in your world?

Mindset

I am reading a book about mindset right now, which has given me a lot of new information to consider.

It’s called “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success” by Carol Dweck, PhD.

The book navigates through the fixed versus growth mindset and the difference between the two and how both can live inside us in specific circumstances and how we usually lean toward one versus the other.

The most fascinating part of the book (other than geeking out on the research and real life examples) is the concept that mindset can be changed.

This is right in line with what I teach in regards to thoughts, feelings, actions, and results and how we improve our habits and our lives.

Our mindset can be adjusted, improved and altered. We’re not stuck. We can choose to consciously change from a fixed to a growth mindset. This expands our world and allow us to release the limitations that a fixed mindset can impose on us.

Thus, we’re only as limited as we choose to be. With a growth mindset, we understand (or can learn) that trying and failing and the process of learning is unending and engaging. With a fixed mindset, we may believe we are only so smart, so talented, so skilled, etc so we get frustrated when we are not achieving what we think we should be (y’all already know how I feel about the word should… if not, click here to review). I found myself feeling defensive during some parts of the book, as I can see where I’ve had a fixed mindset and also where I’ve learned to proceed with more of a growth mindset approach AND the differences between the two.

I’m summarizing what I’ve been reading, of course, and this interpretation is mine (and likely I’m probably not doing it justice).

I’m blessed to have a library at my gym so we can check books out. All of them are educational and inspirational and I am so grateful to my community there and the owner who is always encouraging each of us to grow.

Okay, I digress, back to mindset. How does this apply to improving and transforming our lives?

Our brains are awesome at setting us on autopilot and repeating the same things – over and over and over…. Even to our own detriment (repeating what we know is safe, right? Even if we’ve decided we want to change, that’s still only a thought, it hasn’t translated into action yet).

This can seem impossible to stop or change.

It can seem overwhelming to try to adjust.

The best news I can give you – it’s NOT. It’s all IN YOUR POWER.

Your world exists only in your mind.

Stop and think about it… reality is what we make it. We create our own lives.

Two people can experience the same event (circumstance) and come out of the experience with completely different perspectives and memories of exactly what happened.

How is that possible?

It’s because our thoughts create our world. Whether we have a fixed or growth mindset, we determine our reality and our lives by our thoughts. Have you ever considered that your life and experiences are unique only to you? Even if you share an experience with someone, they’re bringing their history, their past experiences, interpretations, and current reality into that experience and interpreting it based on their thoughts and beliefs.

So, just like learning that a growth mindset can be learned and nurtured, this is also true with our reality. This is the basis of how we begin to change. We first imagine we can, then think we can, then feel that we can, until we take action.

Every action begins with a thought and every choice we make is grounded in our mindset.

I think this is FANTASTIC – because if we’re not happy, we can change. All it takes is that first thought.

Have a wonderful day y’all!!

Results

Results are the outcomes in your life.

They are the result of your actions.

As a reminder, actions are determined by your emotions which are determined by your thoughts about a circumstance. So ultimately, results are the objective outcome of your thoughts about a circumstance that are based on your emotions and actions.

Whether you feel like you’re choosing the results in your life or you aren’t, you are.

Your results are the direct outcome of your thoughts.

You create your thoughts. You create your results.

Your responsibility of what’s occurring in your life is yours. It’s a tough pill to swallow sometimes. Ultimately, our lives are based on our choices. And emotional adulthood is defined by taking responsibility for each of those thoughts, and choices, whether we like them or not.

Simple, but not easy.

With practice, we can learn to create the results we want by changing our thoughts, directing our feelings and accomplishing the actions that bring us to our results.

If we believe we can do something, we can.

If we believe the opposite, we won’t.

I believe I can change and then I do. Awareness of our thoughts is that first step, our outcome is our result.

If you’re not happy with one or more aspects of your life and your weight, you can choose to change.

That choice begins with a thought.

It’s almost magical to have someone by your side guiding you through the process of change.

The secret is that it makes it much easier.

To have support. To have a guide. To have a teacher and a knowledgeable friend at your side.

I know, because it’s worked for me. I have the experience and the knowledge to help in a variety of ways.

I’m not just a physician. Not just a nutritionist. Not just a coach. Not just a wife. Not just a step-mom. I am a person who has taken that journey already.

I had to do the work on my own, but having a coach to teach me, to guide me, to assist me, made it SO MUCH EASIER.

Having an objective friend who will point out when you’re not seeing what your brain wants to hide can be so transformative.

I wish I could teach this to everyone.

What a wonderful world this would be.

The choice, and ultimately the result in your life begins and ends with you.

I’m here whenever you’re ready!

Have a beautiful weekend.

Mind Management

Mind management aka thought work comes in when you want to eat more than you are hungry for;

When you want to eat when you’re not hungry;

when you want to keep eating because something tastes delicious;

When you’re distracted or having fun, or you’re just used to eating until you’re stuffed out of habit.

Some of us find our daily joy in eating.

What if we could find our daily joy in LIFE and not using eating as a way to feel happy, satisfied, joyful, complete, relieved, safe.

What if…

Mind management comes in as well when it’s time to rest, when it’s time to sleep and recharge and yet… your brain seems to click “on” and start running.

Does this happen to you? Is it keeping you from sleeping? Are you not feeling rested when you get up in the morning? Do you think of sleep as a “necessary evil” and try to limit it because you’re JUST.TOO.BUSY?

Our world moves so quickly.

We blink and a year has gone by. Our kids are grown. Our jobs are monotonous. We don’t know the person we’ve married/divorced/dated/lived with for years.

How does this happen? When did we detach? When did we start ignoring ourselves and our health and our hygiene?

Let me help you learn how to create the best life for you.

Learn how to eat for nourishment, to what your body needs but not beyond that.

Learn how to be a healthy weight effortlessly, shed your emotional weight to be the person you were destined to be.

My goal is to give you the tools to become the best version of you and allow you to find your joy, your passion, your happiness in the world.

Then the student becomes the teacher.

Let’s work together to make the world a better place and evolve as humans to our destinies.

Okay, wait, that last part was TOTALLY corny – but I mean it. I can help you get where you want to be. That place in your heart and mind that you know you’re destined for but have NO idea where to start.

I can help. You just have to take that first step!

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